Nurtlikgub is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, fussy weasel.

Nurtlikgub created the Virgo Supercluster two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurtlikgub, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Nurtlikgub, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Nurtlikgub's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Nurtlikgub's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Hide from gray ants for they are unholy.

4. Do not eat lemons.

5. Never jump in holy places.