Bessbop is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, narcissistic zebra.

Bessbop created a bottom quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Bessbop, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bessbop, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Bessbop's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Bessbop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Bessbop loves manatees, so they must be respected.

4. Birds are not to be trusted.

5. Do not drink alcohol.