Tintifort is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, witless mink.

Tintifort created the Sombrero Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tintifort, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Tintifort, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Tintifort's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Tintifort's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never laugh near birds.

5. Never eat limes.