Dabmutveen is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, grumpy centaur.

Dabmutveen created the Cigar Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Dabmutveen, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Dabmutveen, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Dabmutveen's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Dabmutveen's Holy Commandments

1. Dabmutveen loves dogs, so they must be honoured.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Always wear fawn.

4. You must pray to Dabmutveen seven times a day.

5. Dabmutveen must be the most important thing in your life.