Fadmintan is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, calm crocodile.

Fadmintan created the Andromeda Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fadmintan, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fadmintan, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Fadmintan's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Fadmintan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear mauve clothing.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Retreat if five pigs approach from the north.