Mumguttik is a god.

It takes the form of a large, thoughtless goat.

Mumguttik created humanity two million years ago.

If you believe in Mumguttik, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Mumguttik, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Mumguttik's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Mumguttik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Put Mumguttik first in all things.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never eat limes.

5. Run away from red pigs, for they are unholy.