Targpark is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, omnipotent gorilla.

Targpark created viruses five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Targpark, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Targpark, he will come to you in dreams.

Targpark's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Targpark's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention dolphins.

2. Never jump near capybaras.

3. Retreat if six whales approach from the east.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Targpark.