Bitsafgom Tiffombon is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, amazing donkey.

Bitsafgom Tiffombon created Asia two million years ago.

If you believe in Bitsafgom Tiffombon, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bitsafgom Tiffombon, she will turn you into a puffin.

Bitsafgom Tiffombon's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Bitsafgom Tiffombon's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not speak about bread.

3. Never talk about stars.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Always make sure there are no sharks in a room before entering it.