Mumyogzod is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, strong cobra.

Mumyogzod created dark energy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Mumyogzod, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Mumyogzod, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Mumyogzod's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Mumyogzod's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Always help aardvarks in need.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate tortoises.

4. Run away if five doves approach from the west.

5. Do not listen to music.