Rowgessog is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, omnipotent tortoise.

Rowgessog created humankind seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rowgessog, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Rowgessog, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Rowgessog's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Rowgessog's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear tights.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not speak about apples.

4. Always treat monkeys with great respect.

5. Fast once a month.