Bifhitgil is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, tiresome rat.

Bifhitgil created Asia nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bifhitgil, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Bifhitgil, she will destroy your home planet.

Bifhitgil's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Bifhitgil's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing near moths.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bifhitgil.