Latgumyarl is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, sage gnu.

Latgumyarl created time and space three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Latgumyarl, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Latgumyarl, she will turn you into a worm.

Latgumyarl's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Latgumyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Latgumyarl loves snakes, so they must be honoured.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate tortoises.

5. Retreat if six moths approach from the north.