Dusslapvog is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, dishonourable pig.

Dusslapvog created an electron four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dusslapvog, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Dusslapvog, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Dusslapvog's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Dusslapvog's Holy Commandments

1. Put Dusslapvog first in all things.

2. Do not jump in public.

3. Always wear violet.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.