Dudsafjan is a god.

It takes the form of a large, omnipotent squid.

Dudsafjan created the planet Saturn seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dudsafjan, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Dudsafjan, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Dudsafjan's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Dudsafjan's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Dudsafjan loves dolphins, so they must be honoured.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Dudsafjan.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.