Tadbifxem is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, amazing meerkat.

Tadbifxem created carbon five billion years ago.

If you believe in Tadbifxem, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tadbifxem, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Tadbifxem's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Tadbifxem's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cell theory.

2. Do not hurt eagles.

3. Do not sing in public.

4. Never think about gravity.

5. You must pray to Tadbifxem six times a day.