Logfunpib is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, sage gnu.

Logfunpib created a bottom quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Logfunpib, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Logfunpib, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Logfunpib's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Logfunpib's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit near ants.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never go into violet rooms.

5. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Logfunpib on top of all buildings.