Ruttjiplap is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, annoying gerbil.

Ruttjiplap created the Black Eye Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Ruttjiplap, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Ruttjiplap, he will ignore you.

Ruttjiplap's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Ruttjiplap's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Ruttjiplap.

2. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

3. Hide from brown horses for they are unholy.

4. Do not take Ruttjiplap's name in vain.

5. Never write about cell theory.