Cimkingad is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, moody slug.

Cimkingad created the Milkyway five billion years ago.

If you believe in Cimkingad, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cimkingad, it will cry a lot.

Cimkingad's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Cimkingad's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.