Gutbidpad is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, two-faced hummingbird.

Gutbidpad created the planet Earth two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gutbidpad, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Gutbidpad, it will ignore you.

Gutbidpad's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Gutbidpad's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from blue squirrels, for they are unholy.

2. Never wear dresses.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never paint your neck mauve.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gutbidpad.