Vilpakfabbin is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, overgenerous dragonfly.

Vilpakfabbin created the Sombrero Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Vilpakfabbin, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Vilpakfabbin, he will turn you into a tree.

Vilpakfabbin's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Vilpakfabbin's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not wear platinum on your body.

3. Never write about gravity.

4. Never wear tights.

5. Do not kill aardvarks.