Witflagjop is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, dishonourable duck.

Witflagjop created parasitic wasps two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Witflagjop, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Witflagjop, she will remove you from existence.

Witflagjop's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Witflagjop's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never think about comets.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.