Fethugwig is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, grumpy wasp.

Fethugwig created tapeworms nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fethugwig, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Fethugwig, he will turn you into a plant.

Fethugwig's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Fethugwig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill eagles.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never paint your head green.