Tigpangyak is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, grumpy wyvern.

Tigpangyak created the solar system four billion years ago.

If you believe in Tigpangyak, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tigpangyak, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Tigpangyak's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Tigpangyak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. You must love Tigpangyak.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Do not hurt great tits.

5. Do not commit murder.