Badpakkom is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, omniscient aardvark.

Badpakkom created the Black Eye Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Badpakkom, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Badpakkom, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Badpakkom's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Badpakkom's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about nematodes.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Badpakkom.

5. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.