Gemfonvon is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, two-faced sheep.

Gemfonvon created the Whirlpool Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Gemfonvon, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gemfonvon, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Gemfonvon's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Gemfonvon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not jump in public.

2. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

3. Do not eat grapes.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.