Narpomboss is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, merciless cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Narpomboss created the Small Magellanic Cloud two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Narpomboss, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Narpomboss, he will turn you into a duck.

Narpomboss' most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Narpomboss' Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Retreat if four whales approach from the north.

3. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

4. Never write about comets.

5. Never look in ponds.