Janhomcep is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, narcissistic mongoose.

Janhomcep created a charm quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Janhomcep, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Janhomcep, she will turn you into a frog.

Janhomcep's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Janhomcep's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about cell theory.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never mention birds.