Vidkikcudfarnhablig is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, narcissistic porpoise.

Vidkikcudfarnhablig created a top quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vidkikcudfarnhablig, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Vidkikcudfarnhablig, he will turn you into a rat.

Vidkikcudfarnhablig's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Vidkikcudfarnhablig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about nematodes.

2. Vidkikcudfarnhablig loves seals, so they must be honoured.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

4. Do not eat peanuts.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.