Ceptaldagveenjigpigjab is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, unsympathetic cow.

Ceptaldagveenjigpigjab created gold five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ceptaldagveenjigpigjab, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Ceptaldagveenjigpigjab, it will turn you into a sheep.

Ceptaldagveenjigpigjab's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Ceptaldagveenjigpigjab's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention snakes.

2. Never talk about gravity.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

5. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.