Nandavcim is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, loving cobra.

Nandavcim created vertebrates four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nandavcim, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Nandavcim, she will turn you into a mouse.

Nandavcim's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Nandavcim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never write about stars.

3. Never paint your chest green.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Nandavcim loves pigs, so they must be respected.