Bonkrowabbom is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, amazing lizard.

Bonkrowabbom created an electron seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonkrowabbom, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bonkrowabbom, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Bonkrowabbom's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Bonkrowabbom's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not dye your hair cyan.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.