Hatjanfar is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, flying shark.

Hatjanfar created the planet Earth five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hatjanfar, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Hatjanfar, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Hatjanfar's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Hatjanfar's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Hatjanfar loves snakes, so they must be honoured.