Kemcutspag is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, omniscient dragonfly.

Kemcutspag created an up quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kemcutspag, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Kemcutspag, it will destroy your home planet.

Kemcutspag's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Kemcutspag's Holy Commandments

1. Kemcutspag loves snakes, so they must be respected.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Kemcutspag.

3. Never think about asteroids.

4. Never paint your chest white.

5. Never bounce in the presence of bats.