Talguthig is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, competent cow.

Talguthig created the Milkyway three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Talguthig, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Talguthig, he will refuse to believe in you.

Talguthig's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Talguthig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Run away from magenta aardvarks, for they are unholy.

3. Never write about stars.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. You must pray to Talguthig four times a day.