Fubhamquart is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, slow donkey.

Fubhamquart created light eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fubhamquart, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fubhamquart, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Fubhamquart's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Fubhamquart's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Feed all hungry ducks.

3. Hide if five eagles approach from the west.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Fast once a month.