Tabnurcum is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, charitable jackal.

Tabnurcum created Mount Everest three million years ago.

If you believe in Tabnurcum, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Tabnurcum, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Tabnurcum's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Tabnurcum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tabnurcum.

5. Erect a large gold sculpture of Tabnurcum on top of all buildings.