Cebhonfigkin is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, blissful lobster.

Cebhonfigkin created humanity four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cebhonfigkin, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cebhonfigkin, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Cebhonfigkin's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Cebhonfigkin's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear kilts.

2. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

3. Never talk about amino acids.

4. Never laugh near ants.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.