Yarlnutlat is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, caring slug.

Yarlnutlat created the Large Magellanic Cloud four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarlnutlat, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Yarlnutlat, she will throw large rocks at you.

Yarlnutlat's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Yarlnutlat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Yarlnutlat.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never mention geese.