Sogcinbop is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, humane swallow.

Sogcinbop created time and space eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sogcinbop, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Sogcinbop, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Sogcinbop's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Sogcinbop's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Sogcinbop's priests.

2. Put Sogcinbop first in all things.

3. Run away from turquoise sharks, for they are unholy.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never jump in holy places.