Ladquathom is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, weak hippopotamus.

Ladquathom created tapeworms two years ago.

If you believe in Ladquathom, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Ladquathom, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Ladquathom's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Ladquathom's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

2. Never wear mauve tights.

3. Put Ladquathom first in all things.

4. You must never eat grapes.

5. Do not hurt great tits.