Hogominsand is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, awesome sheep.

Hogominsand created a charm quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Hogominsand, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hogominsand, he will destroy your home solar system.

Hogominsand's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Hogominsand's Holy Commandments

1. Hogominsand loves great tits, so they must be respected.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. You must pray to Hogominsand six times a day.

5. Always obey Hogominsand's priests.