Pongupxuck is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, ruthless newt.

Pongupxuck created the Andromeda Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pongupxuck, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Pongupxuck, he will destroy your favourite star.

Pongupxuck's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Pongupxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Pongupxuck.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never talk about comets.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always take life seriously.