Cutwabsit is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, unjust toad.

Cutwabsit created a quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cutwabsit, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cutwabsit, he will turn you into a snail.

Cutwabsit's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Cutwabsit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat peas.

2. Always wear violet.

3. Never feed corn to horses while wearing purple stockings.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate turtles.