Pintunstig is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, deceitful centaur.

Pintunstig created humankind three million years ago.

If you believe in Pintunstig, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Pintunstig, it will cry a lot.

Pintunstig's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Pintunstig's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry gulls.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Pintunstig loves grasshopers, so they must be respected.

5. Do not kill moths.