Zagbodmumjam is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, egotistical alligator.

Zagbodmumjam created a down quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zagbodmumjam, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Zagbodmumjam, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Zagbodmumjam's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Zagbodmumjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Do not speak about pineapples.

4. Zagbodmumjam loves porpoises, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not hurt shrews.