Catfigbap is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, selfish wyrm.

Catfigbap created the Sun nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Catfigbap, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Catfigbap, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Catfigbap's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Catfigbap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate mice.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Respect your elders.