Sigcutgud is a god.

It takes the form of a large, passionate narwhal.

Sigcutgud created an electron nine million years ago.

If you believe in Sigcutgud, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Sigcutgud, it will not care.

Sigcutgud's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Sigcutgud's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing in holy places.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Erect a large tin sculpture of Sigcutgud on top of all buildings.

5. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.