Yarptignuttdodyamlenquill is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, smart shark.

Yarptignuttdodyamlenquill created humanity six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarptignuttdodyamlenquill, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Yarptignuttdodyamlenquill, he will turn you into a rock.

Yarptignuttdodyamlenquill's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Yarptignuttdodyamlenquill's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never mention mice.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not dye your hair black.

5. Always wear blue.