Panganbastpibkam is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, temperamental crab.

Panganbastpibkam created life two billion years ago.

If you believe in Panganbastpibkam, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Panganbastpibkam, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Panganbastpibkam's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Panganbastpibkam's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in holy places.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.