Xenkapbus is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, annoying donkey.

Xenkapbus created a photon nine million years ago.

If you believe in Xenkapbus, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Xenkapbus, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Xenkapbus' most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Xenkapbus' Holy Commandments

1. Never go into red rooms.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not take Xenkapbus' name in vain.
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